The Friday Sex Blog [The Big Bang]

¡Hola! Everybody...
Some may find the first part of this post offensive. No apologies offered. I want to thank a dear friend and former lover for allowing me to use her photo and part of our story for today's blog. She read it in advance and actually enjoyed it (helped me edit some of it) -- thought it was important to share. She doesn't live in the US, but we had an intense, loving affair one summer a few years back...

* * *

-=[ The Big Show ]=-
... I feel like a storm, like the ocean, the waves... I want to fuck everything into my womb. A woman suffers not giving her love. To be fully satisfied, she must absolutely live in the depth of her love.
-- Jennifer Garcia

She’s beyond beautiful, she’s feminine sexuality itself, but throughout all our sexing, there’s always this holding back. Sure, she does everything to please me: she happily goes doggy-style and lets me penetrate her deeply and she revels in my deep thrusts, looking back over her shoulder and urging me on, thrusting back herself. She takes me into her mouth to the point of gagging and even swallowed my sperm -- all for my pleasure. But somewhere inside, this is all something dirty and she’s afraid to be a slut for me because some part of her is ashamed.

I want her to show me, to tell me what she wants. I want to know her -- the real her. I want her to grind her cunt against my face and take her pleasure. It’s a gradual process. Little by little we talk, communicating openly, talking about what we like and what we want and who we are and she begins to open. At first, it’s just a little bit -- like when she looks into my eyes while we’re fucking. Or when she squeezes the opening to my cock and smells it, or licks at my pre cum greedily -- all things she was ashamed of doing before.

She opens slowly and I wait patiently for the day when the floodgates open. She tells me she’s never met a man who was so curious and interested in her sex and at first it frightened her, but she enjoys the openness, the permission to be what we want.

One day, while I’m fucking her from behind, she pleads for me to stop. She throws me on my back and tells me, “It’s my turn,” and proceeds to ride my cock in the way that brings her most pleasure -- on top of me, facing me and all I ask is that she stays in the moment with me, looking into my eyes. I lay back, a passive tool to her aggressive grasp for pleasure, and she takes the reins of our sexing and rides me for all she’s worth, not caring, throwing caution to the wind. I feel her moistness. She scrapes her fingers against my chest. Eventually, she takes me on waves of bliss until she comes in violent bursts, her petite taut body trembling, pulsing, and I can feel the walls of her vagina vibrate, exquisitely wrapping my cock in a tender and tight moist cocoon...

All sex, in fact all life, is about the meeting of masculine and feminine energy -- the yin/ yang of life. I envision masculine energy as consciousness and feminine essence as light. This does not mean that men always embody the masculine, or that women only embody feminine energy. What it means is that sexual union is always about a conscious (masculine) presence penetrating a yielding, loving surrender. With some couples, one partner holds more masculine energy, and the other feminine. Some more sexually conscious couples will alternate who is the leading, masculine polarity and who is the yielding feminine polarity. This has very little to do with physical positions and more to do with attitude -- disposition.

As soon as a woman becomes more assertive, initiating, and penetrating with her presence, and as soon as a man relaxes, waits, becomes soft and vulnerable the sexual polarities have been reversed. This can be a great thing to practice intentionally, to experience more deeply the opposite sexual essence. For a couple that has learned to polarize and merge, sex changes from merely a personal act for intensifying pleasure into something quite different. Orgasm is a glorified sneeze when compared to the potential that arises once we step out of the box of rubbing genitals to release pressure or to connect.

When partners are willing to manipulate and cultivate sexual energy, they both arrive to a sexual meeting of fullness. In this scenario, the man has not only realized himself as empty consciousness, but he has also brought that realization down into his body. The woman has not only experienced love and connection, but she has also practiced opening so much that she radiates love itself, from her whole body. She actually becomes the body of the divine feminine: the supreme strength of absolute surrender.

This is not a matter of imitating or acting out in a certain way, rather it is relaxing into your natural essence -- to your genuine essence. This takes no effort at all, only conscious practice. In this form of sexing, the couple isn’t meeting in order to get something from each other. They are not meeting to get off on waves of physical pleasure. They are not even meeting to love each other in the sense that we normally think of love. Sex in this context is being offered at the altar of spirituality itself.

This is why I pray... LOL

This form of sexual union is the “human replication of the union of consciousness and light.” This union can occur within an individual and in our hypermasculine world, this was as good as it got. People became unified within themselves and presented themselves to the world. But the sexing I’m speaking to here is quite different. When we consciously choose to embody the union of consciousness and light, both partners are releasing a gift that is universal, rather than personal. When a man and a woman sex in this way, the two offerings become a full circle, and there is a unification of consciousness and light, of yin and yang, something much greater than could ever occur within an individual. The masculine gives the feminine a deep trustworthy consciousness presence, through one’s body, and the feminine essence gives the masculine deep love and light. In that way, ego boundaries finally break and they pour into one another.

Man, freed by the realizations that, no matter what, he can still fully give of himself is no longer afraid to open into life and finds the union of consciousness and form. Woman, finally freed of her longing to be fully penetrated by God, allows a fuller love to move through her. She realizes, in the unconditional giving, that her world is already fully penetrated by divine consciousness all the time, and always has been. In a way, she becomes the Divine Goddess, the feminine principle itself, open in radiant love. By consciously surrendering to the masculine principle, she is transported beyond her longing to be loved into being love itself.

Love,

Eddie

PS: Sex is good for you.

Sunday Sermon [The Witness]

¡Hola! Everybody...
Well... am I being too cynical if I express my deeply felt conviction that the real reason Sarah “I’m Proud to be a Dumb Twat” Palin resigned as governor is because a particularly nasty tape of her gargling gallons of Alaskan young male sperm has surfaced?

What? I’m just saying...

I mean, c’mon, was anyone else watching that obscenely awful press conference? The line “She fucked her brains out,” kept coming to kind. You know what’s really tragic? That such a sorry, utterly clueless, intellectually bereft specimen of humanity would be elected to any political office. SMH...

* * *

-=[ Witness ]=-

Today I’m going to try to offer something of practical value. After reading this, you’ll be able to use it (or not) and perhaps effect some change...

Too often external factors have such a huge impact on our lives. Someone steps on your toes, or looks at you in a certain way, or cuts you off on the highway, and that just sends you over the edge. Even something as simple (and beyond our control) as the weather affects our perception and how we feel. It’s all so random, it seems...

... Or is it? Hmmmmm....

Imagine, if you can, that you are mangled in a car accident. Your body is crushed amidst tangled, jagged metal and you are lying in a pool of blood.

Now, imagine sleeping in a large, comfortable bed. Switch back to being mangled in a car accident. The difference you feel is made from the same thoughts that create your personal suffering.

Confused? What does this mean? How do you discover the cause of your suffering and the source of genuine happiness? And, what the fuck does this have to do with being mangled and beds?

LOL! Bear with me and try the following and see if you get any answers:

Go between the two feelings: relaxed, lying in a big comfortable bed/ mangled, lying in a pool of blood. Picture each, feel both, then one and then the other. Mangled body. Soft bed.

Now, pay attention because this is the important part. Feel the “who” that can feel both images, and relax as that “who” now.

You -- the real you -- are this capacity to witness.

The images are merely objects for your attention. The true you is the awareness of being aware. Your genuine self is the feeling-awareness that notices the movement of attention between the images. I call this The Witness, others call it witness consciousness. Different spiritual traditions have different names for this awareness of awareness, but they all point to the same thing, regardless of the terminology.

You are the space where the pictures happen, where attention moves between a mangled body and a soft bed. The imagery changes but the feeling-awareness -- who you are -- always maintains this openness to feel. Awakening to your true self is being able to relax into this capacity to feel, whatever picture is happening now. If you can develop this awareness into a freedom to feel, no matter what is happening, you become free to act as love.

If you forget this openness of feeling even for a second, then you become trapped again. the inconsiderate driver, the discourteous interaction, the real and imagined insults, all will have power over you again. You will go around life renting this precious space to other people -- many who are strangers and insignificant. If you can learn to remember this essential openness, who you are, you begin to discover that love acts spontaneously, unfettered by the present picture of your life.

But don’t take my word for this. Discover what is true for yourself when you do this exercise. See if you change with the picture, or if you are this open awareness where the picture happens, the openness who feels what happens.

Test it now. Mangled body/ soft bed. The images have changed, but in what space does the light of your imagination shine? Is this feeling-awareness any different? Are you aware of your awareness?

Love,

Eddie

Stretching It...

¡Hola! Everybody...
I hope to start my holiday weekend a little early. I am going away (to Boston and New Hampshire), so I’ll be scarce. Please be careful driving if you’re traveling and leave the fireworks to the experts:

alcohol x stupidity + fireworks (firearms) = “accidents”

Don’t be an idiot.

* * *

-=[ Expansions ]=-

Man's mind once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimension.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes

You have everything you need, in this very moment, to be happy. If I were to stop right there, that is all I would need to say to you.

I am not referring to bullshit happiness here, I am pointing to a form of happiness beyond your wildest imagination. A happiness that endures through all the vicissitudes of life, an invincible summer in the heart of your winter.

Our problem isn’t that we need to attain something, be something, or improve something. You’re quite fine right now. No, our basic problem is simply that we have forgotten our true selves. Having become entangled in the never-ending dramatic cycle of being an individual, striving for individual recognition, achievement, satisfaction we feel separate, alienated, and at war with our world. We have forgotten of our essential truth. “Expanding your mind” is breaking through this limited self-concept, integrating to a basic unity that has always been, and accessing the spark of the divine light you carry within.

You see the problem is not one of learning enough or achieving enough in order to pull ourselves out of our present state of “inadequacy,” as we have been conditioned to believe. It is instead simply a problem of perceiving the truth as it is, without distortion. As we expand our consciousness, we become more aware of our universe and our place in it.

The solution is one of perception. Our ability to perceive clearly depends on a methodology that stretches our nervous system, expanding its range, and in that way allowing consciousness to expand. Spirituality, a true integral spirituality, is the science of expanding consciousness. Expanding your consciousness is returning to the Source that created you, becoming conscious of the source of your energy, and becoming one with that Source. Spiritual technologies exist that help you access this energy and once you have experienced this expanded state, you will never be the same.

I think the first step is to develop what I call The Witness. It’s the part of your consciousness that is aware that you are aware. In Buddhism, this is called mindfulness, and some consider it the opposable thumb of consciousness. When you the limited concept of yourself, your ego, dedicates itself to an expanded self, then you have entered a completely new path.

Life is always willing to teach you -- the universe is just waiting for you to be available. In fact, it’s constantly putting opportunities in your path to learn and to evolve from your current state. You have probably considered them irritations and problems and done everything to avoid them.

You have gone through your daily life absorbed in the drama -- the pleasures, the pains, your dreams and frustrations. As you evolve spiritually, you identify more with your Higher Self and you begin to lose interest in the little and big games going on around you. In fact, you learn to be in the game and, at the same time, in a higher expanded consciousness, watching from a detached (“witness”) perspective.

From this expanded consciousness you totally experience the sensation, thought, or feeling going on in the present moment and at the same time are able to observe it objectively, fully conscious, without the usual attendant inner commentary. In this way, the thought or feeling loses its hold on you and ceases to be an irritation or obsession. Then the work begins -- the peeling away of layer after layer mental illusions you have come to think of as part of your self.

Love,

Eddie

Monday Madness (Moral Reasoning)

¡Hola! Everybody,
Happy St. Paddy’s day, people. great day to take advantage of a drunken lass! ::grin:: Today an mad prelude (really a poem) and a map!

* * *

Nows [no. 2]

You’re fighting me I find,
and you will fight me all the way
to that painful
instant of surrender
we can both already sense.

You will fight
my instant messages
my postcards
my presents
and my desperate calls.

You will fight
the endless affections of my tongue
and I will ignore
your enormous eyes
and that unbearable smile.

I can buy you
jewelry,
airplane tickets,
roses,
dinners in San Juan,
and clothes you must learn to
love yourself to wear
and still you will fight me.

Because I have taken away
your practiced old
game of giving,
and made of you
an honest trader again.

-- Edward-Yemíl Rosario

* * *

-=[ A Map ]=-

Not too long ago, I sat beside a woman on a panel. We were addressing college students, and what struck me about this particular woman was the level of her selfishness. I found it interesting because she sought me out before we spoke and mentioned that she too was a “practicing Buddhist.” Her version of Buddhism, it seemed to me, was simply meditation. I had a teacher who once joked that practicing Buddhism without ethics was like trying to row a boat without first untying it from the pier.

What struck me about this woman was that her whole existence centered on her and she was oblivious to how she was connected to her environment; how her actions reverberated and caused ripples. In her world, what mattered was the conscious cultivation of her ego. She could actually see the “logic” in the needless death of an infant. This is what happens when you mix Ayn Rand with meditation! LOL Nothing could be further from my vision of Buddhist practice.

Two people, two different worlds.

This got me to thinking and I have come to realization that “practicing meditation” or any set of practices isn’t enough. I have come to realize that we create our world according to what level we operate from. It’s the same with love. For some people love’s ultimate reason for existence is to satisfy the individual. Love is something that you go “out there” to get in order to satisfy your hunger for connection. similarly, religion and everything else is filtered -- distilled according to where you stand in terms of growth.

I’ll explain. Let’s look at moral development as a starting off point. Let’s say moral development has three distinct stages. An infant at birth hasn’t been socialized into the culture’s ethics, standards, and conventions; let’s call this the preconventional stage. It’s also known as egocentric, in that the infant’s awareness is largely consumed with self -- self-absorbed. but as the young child begins to learn its culture’s rules and norms, it grows into the conventional stage of morals. This stage is also known as ethnocentric, in that it’s focused on the child’s particular group, tribe, clan, or nation, and it therefore tends to exclude those not of its group. But at the next major stage of moral development, the post-conventional stage, the individual’s identity expands to include care and concern for all peoples, regardless of race, color, sex, or creed, which is why this stage is also known as worldcentric.

If you’re still with me, you can see that moral development tends to move from “me” (egocentric) to “us” (ethnocentric) to “all of us” (worldcentric). This is an example of unfolding waves of consciousness.

Using this consciousness “map” one can see how religion (or love) will manifest itself differently in a person who’s at the egocentric stage than a person who’s at a worldcentric stage. Both people can be just as devout (or “in love”), but spiritual practice will evolve according to any one individual’s level of moral development.

So imagine love from an egocentric perspective. Love at this stage resembles a yearning -- something like a need for a fix -- an ego boost. Same thing with almost anything you look at in life: it changes according to what level you choose to engage the world. religion from an egocentric perspective probably resembles the scary wave of fundamentalism currently threatening our existence. And I mention fundamentalism in all its manifestations -- including our own home-grown Christian fundamentalism.

I find all this quite interesting because a lot of my work involves helping people move from one stage to another. But it’s also interesting because it helps me tease out the idiosyncrasies when someone says, “I love you.” Perhaps we need to know a little more about others and ourselves when we travel the terrain of the heart. For what may sound like “I love you” may in actuality mean “I love me.”

I would like to start using this “map” as a way to discuss different issues.

Love,

Eddie

[un]Common Sense Sex Blog (The Big Show)

¡Hola! Everybody,
Just so everyone is clear: I’m wearing underwear! New ones! LOL But I realized a little while ago, I put my undies backwards today.

Got up this morning and because I still haven’t connected the cable, I’m not watching TV which means I have no clue as to the weather. But shit, it’s winter right? It’s fuckin cold, period. I didn’t realize it snowed during the night until I stepped outside. I’m meeting with a state senator later today, so I have dress shoes on. Yuck...

I want to thank my dear friend, a former lover, for allowing me to use her photo and part of our story for today's blog. She read it in advance and actually enjoyed it (helped me edit some of it) -- thought it was important to share. She doesn't live in the US, but we had an intense, loving affair one summer a few years back...

* * *

-=[ The Big Show ]=-
“... I feel like a storm, like the ocean, the waves... I want to fuck everything into my womb. A woman suffers not giving her love. To be fully satisfied, she must absolutely live in the depth of her love.”
-- Jennifer Garcia

She’s beyond beautiful, she’s feminine sexuality itself, but throughout all our sexing, there’s always this holding back. Sure, she does everything to please me: she happily goes doggy-style and lets me penetrate her deeply and she revels in my deep thrusts, looking back over her shoulder and urging me on, thrusting back herself. She takes me into her mouth to the point where her gag reflex kicks in and even swallowed my sperm -- all for my pleasure. But somewhere inside, this is all something dirty and she’s afraid to be a slut for me because some part of her is ashamed.

I want her to show me, to tell me what she wants. I want to know her -- the real her. I want her to grind her cunt against my face and take her pleasure, but it’s been a gradual process. Little by little we talk, communicating openly, talking about what we like and what we want and who we are and she begins to open. At first, it’s just a little bit -- like when she looks into my eyes while we’re fucking. Or when she squeezes the opening to my cock and smells it, or licks at my pre cum greedily -- all things she was ashamed of doing before.

She opens slowly like a beautiful flower and I wait patiently for the day when the floodgates open. She tells me she’s never met a man who was so curious and interested in her sex and at first it frightened her, but she enjoys the openness, the permission to be what we want.

One day, while I’m fucking her brutally from behind, she pleads for me to stop. She throws me on my back and tells me, “It’s my turn,” and proceeds to ride my cock in the way that brings her most pleasure -- on top of me, facing me and all I ask is that she stays in the moment with me, looking into my eyes. I lay back, a passive tool to her aggressive grasp for pleasure, and she takes the reins of our sexing and rides me for all she’s worth, not caring, throwing caution to the wind. Her pussy is sopping wet and I feel her moistness. She scrapes her fingers against my chest. Eventually, she takes me on waves of bliss until she comes in violent bursts, her petite taut body trembling, pulsing, and I can feel the walls of her vagina vibrate, exquisitely wrapping my cock in a tender and tight moist cocoon...

All sex, in fact all life, is about the meeting of masculine and feminine energy -- the yin/ yang of life. I envision masculine energy as consciousness and feminine essence as light. This does not mean that men always represent the masculine, or that women always hold feminine energy. What it means is that sexual union is always about a conscious (masculine) presence penetrating a yielding, loving surrender. With some couples, one partner holds more masculine energy, and the other holds more feminine. Some more sexually conscious couples will alternate who is the leading, masculine polarity and who is the feminine yielding polarity. This has very little to do with physical positions and more to do with attitude -- disposition.

As soon as a woman becomes more assertive, initiating, and penetrating with her presence, and as soon as a man relaxes, waits, becomes soft and vulnerable the sexual polarities have been reversed. This can be a great thing to practice intentionally, to experience more deeply the opposite sexual essence. For a couple that has learned to polarize and merge, sex changes from merely a personal act for intensifying pleasure into something quite different. Orgasm is a glorified sneeze when compared to the potential that arises once we step out of the box of rubbing genitals to release pressure or to connect.

When partners are willing to manipulate and cultivate sexual energy, they both arrive to a sexual meeting of fullness. The man has not only realized himself as empty consciousness, but he has also brought that realization down into his body. The woman has not only experienced love and connection, but she has also practiced opening so much that she radiates love itself, from her whole body. She actually becomes the body of the divine feminine: the supreme strength of absolute surrender.

This is not a matter of imitating or acting out in a certain way, but relaxing into your natural essence. This takes no effort at all, only conscious practice. In this form of sexing, the couple isn’t meeting in order to get something from each other. They are not meeting to get off on waves of physical pleasure. They are not even meeting to love each other in a personal way. Sex in this context is being offered at the altar of spirituality itself.

This is why I pray... LOL

This form of sexual union is the “human replication of the union of consciousness and light.” This union can occur within an individual and in our hypermasculine world, this was as good as it got. People became unified within themselves and presented themselves to the world without gender. But the sexing I’m speaking to here is quite different. When we consciously choose to embody the union of consciousness and light, both partners are allowing a gift that is universal, rather than personal. When a man and a woman sex in this way, the two offerings become a full circle, and there is a unification of consciousness and light, of yin and yang, something much greater than could ever occur within an individual. The masculine gives the feminine a deep trustworthy consciousness presence, through one’s body, and the feminine essence gives the masculine deep love and light. In that way, the boundaries finally break and they pour into one another.

Man, freed by the realizations that, no matter what, he can still fully give of himself is no longer afraid to open into life and finds the union of consciousness and form. Woman, finally freed of her longing to be fully penetrated by God, allows a fuller love to move through her. She realizes, in the unconditional giving, that her world is already fully penetrated by the divine consciousness all the time, and always has been. In a way, she becomes the Divine Goddess, the feminine principle itself, open in radiant love. By consciously surrendering to the masculine principle, she is transported beyond her longing to be loved into being love itself.

Love,

Eddie