The Friday Sex Blog [Mambo]

¡Hola! Everybody…
Depending on where you’re at in terms of personal development, if you thought I was a sexist pig before today, the following will remove all doubt. Oh yeah, and fuck you too. LOL!

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-=[ The Black Mambo ]=-

[Note: Aside from its better-known definition of a Latin@ dance form, Mambo is the term for a female High Priestess in the Vodou religion. They are the highest form of clergy in the religion, whose responsibility it is to preserve the rituals and songs and maintain the relationship between the spirits and the community as a whole (though some of this is the responsibility of the whole community as well). They are entrusted with leading the service of all of the spirits of their lineage.]

I had a friend once who fainted while getting his cocked sucked. This is true…

To be fair, the woman responsible was no ordinary woman. Her skin was an almost impossible shade of buttery brown and she was sublimely beautiful. Regal in her bearing, her prominently chiseled cheekbones framed eyes shaped like goldfish, her full lips, evoking her African ancestry, glistened with dew, her lush ripe breasts hung just right, and the possibilities and potentialities between her shy smile and her magnificently shaped ass were infinite. She walked as if she were royalty and the world syncopated itself to the sway of her curvaceous hips. A subtle but palpable energy enclosed her and her amber eyes shone with an intelligence and wisdom beyond her young years.

And she would have nothing to do with me. In fact, I believe at times she was downright scared of me. She once told a mutual friend that I had powerful spirits all around me -- some benevolent, but many evil.

Many would say she was just a whore, but many more whispered she was a bruja, a Vodou priestess, a succubus. She had many admirers, and she could’ve quite possibly enjoyed a comfortable life of leisure if she chose. I don’t k now if she was any of these things, but I do know she absolutely worshiped cock. I can still remember clearly all these years later. It was a summer night, the air hot as held breath. And we, my friends and I, we were on a drug and alcohol-induced prowl and somehow we ended up at her place -- in the middle of some crazy party.

My friend was absolutely taken by her and I wondered why she even bothered with him. If she was a whore, as many claimed, she was obviously a high-priced one and my friend was broke. In fact, we were all just a group of five horny motherfuckers barely into our twenties, just out for a good time. I had seen her around occasionally accompanied by an older man who walked around scowling all the time. Some said he was her husband, but that seemed unlikely to me. In any case, the scowling man jealously guarded her and word was he had stabbed Blackie just for looking at her wrong. And Blackie was a Golden Gloves champion, just starting out on a promising professional boxing career.

Anyway, my friend just had to have her and she seemed willing, but there was the problem of the old man, so we decided we would act as lookouts while he tried to get with the Black Angel.

The music was so loud, we couldn’t hear ourselves think. There was much dancing, and the tenement apartment was packed with people. So packed, in fact, that no one (except us) noticed when my friend and the Black Angel retreated into a nook and began making out. I was supposed to be a lookout, but I couldn’t take my eyes off of her carnally-fashioned form. Kneeling, she took my friend in her mouth.

“Do you like cock?” my friend asked.

She nodded yes as she looked up into his eyes.

I wouldn’t say that she liked cock -- my friend’s cock or any particular cock -- she actually worshiped cock. She was a cock worshiper. When I looked at her, she was already gone, she sucked and she groaned, drool coming down her chin and neck. Her eyes were rolling, opening and closing. It seemed as if she couldn’t get enough. My yelled at me to look out for the old man, but I was watching her swallow him like a woman possessed.

Some women enjoy being with a man and getting him off, but this woman worshiped cock. It was a completely different thing. Some women are wives, you see, some women want to find a good man to love. Cock to women like that is always a part of their men, the men they love, the men they open to intimately. Other women, women like the Black Angel, I realized, are cock worshipers. They want to open and take cock. It’s their way of opening up spiritually, of surrendering open and taking The One so deep they are lost in the worship, obliterated in the giving of themselves, gone in their love of cock -- not of a man as a character, as a husband or boyfriend, or lover, but lost in the love of cock itself.

Wifely women can’t fake that they’re into cock -- they may be into their man’s cock, but not any cock. Women like this woman, I thought as I watched this incarnated sex goddess devour my friend, they can certainly love a man, but they will always worship cock. No woman could ever be forced to be something she is not.

My friend started talking to the Black Angel while she was still ravenously mouthing him. “Yesssss, take it all, baby. Take it, take it… take it like I know you want to.”

The sound of the drums playing pounded away and the very floor seemed to be shaking from all the dancing and everyone seemed to be oblivious. The space filled with an intense energy. This was more than oral sex, it felt more like a religious vision/ conversion. The air felt thick, as if a heavy pleasure were pressing down into all of our bodies. My point of view changed, so that I felt as if I were outside the room, feeling the entire apartment and the sweating, jubilant people in it, eliciting a vision dense with color, pregnant with love-bliss, and yet I was still there, standing in the room as a body.

Tears were streaming down her face in her adoration of cock. She was fully abandoned in her passionate attentions, in rapture, as were we all. People were dancing, their arms extended in the air, some were laughing, the room had filled with ecstasy pressing all of us open. Dancers abandoned themselves to ancient rhythms in worship of gods and goddesses long forgotten. My body felt filled with a force, the same force of thick love that filled the room -- that was the room. My breath deepened and my cock engorged, filled with the same love-substance… and I realized when I looked away that none of us were looking out for the old man, who was now headed directly to the little alcove where all this was happening.

I turned around quickly to warn my friend, when I saw that his legs trembled and he folded in on himself as if he were a puppet and promptly fell flat on his face, unconscious. The Black Angel had left, disappeared.

The Old Scowling Man finally made his way to us and demanding, “What’s going on here?!”

“I think my friend fainted,” I managed to get out.

Love,

Eddie

The Friday Sex Blog [Sex as Prayer]

¡Hola! Everybody…
My main computer is once again freaking out on me! Arrrggghhh!

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-=[ Sex as Prayer ]=-

Free your ass, your mind will follow...

Most Christians would consider the joining of sex and spirituality a heresy. I say, take it up with the man you call your God. After all, according to dogma, He invented everything in six days (even He had to rest). LOL

Seriously, most of us compartmentalize our lives. For too many people sex is something they do in the darkened chambers of their shame.

I would submit that fucking is the highest form of prayer any couple (married or not) can offer to the Divine. As an expression of the Universal Principle, it creates unity and joy which are surely signs of a Divine presence. As an expression of the couple’s love for one another, it is the deepest affirmation that love is their work. With such power to elicit the presence of the Divine, I have to wonder why there is so little written or taught about sex as prayer. This is especially puzzling as I browse the aisles of bookstores brimming with books on centering prayer, charismatic prayer, holistic prayer, The Jesus prayer, blah blah blah…

Don’t answer that question, it’s a rhetorical device. The answer is found in the Church’s two-thousand-year anti-sex campaign. Christianity views the flesh as the domain of the devil -- as sinful -- and could never be integrated into Christian spirituality. On another, less evident level, the neglect of sex is an expression of a deep-rooted fear: the fear of mystery. Due to an irrational religious dogma that has lost much of its relevance, we intentionally exclude this mystery from our daily lives.

Essentially, we have chosen to live in fear and anxiety rather than face the mystery. We push sex into the dark recesses of our psyches where it then becomes deviant -- a dark and twisted power that controls our motivations even as we deny its existence. We do this at our own peril.

We will fight tooth and nail, for example, to cover a statue’s breasts, but stay mum when our children are subjected to watching literally tens of thousands of simulated murders and other acts of violence before they reach the age of seven. Tits are evil, but watching a human being gunned down senselessly is kewl.

The naked form is evil, but subjecting our children to endless stream of advertisements created by marketing experts for the sole purpose of making our children mindless consumers is OK.

Our escape from the mystery of sex has placed our lives in jeopardy. We think we fear loss of freedom, fear the terrorists, or fear unending war, but the reality we fear more than all enemies real or imagined, is the reality of sex and the surrender it demands.

It’s no wonder the most predominant characteristic of our age is impotence, Not that we are without power, but that we experience ourselves individually and collectively as powerless. The consequences of this powerless are seen everywhere. We have an abundance of food, yet millions go hungry. We are surrounded by multitudes and yet many of us go lonely. We have sex but only as a scratch for an ego itch -- sex without substance. And I’m not talking about casual vs. committed sex. Both forms of sex can be liberating -- sex is essentially a liberating force -- I know too many people in committed relationships who have “empty calorie” sex.

No, what we have is the old familiar and bitter fear which breeds more and more weapons of mass destruction. We are afraid. We fear love. We fear sex. We have forgotten how to dance.

If you want to know the way out, sexual union points the way. Why do you think that those who want to brings us back to the “good old days” (conservatives) try so desperately to control anything having to do with sex/ Why do you think religious institutions place so many restrictions on sex? The answers lies in the fact that sexual union is probably one of the most powerful mechanisms for personal liberation. The cliché of “free your mind, your ass will follow,” may have it backwards: perhaps the body is the territory of our liberation.

Sexual union invites us as lovers to go beyond a society and a self that views its accomplishments, its goals, its vision of reality, its technical achievements, as ends in themselves -- as idols. Sexual union offers a path in which we gain a perspective of what is lasting and what is temporary. Sexual union is mutual surrender to the mystery and the heart of human life and love. Sex is the reminder that we are not the center of the universe: The Divine is the center and that divinity lies within each of us and is strengthened and made real when we come together.

Love,

Eddie

The Sexual Subversive [The Erotic Imagination]

¡Hola! Everybody…
I’m currently trying out for different jobs, so wish me luck. One would entail moving to DC… yikes! LOL

If it’s Friday, it has to be about s-e-x!

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-=[ The Erotic Imagination ]=-

Erotic behavior is complex, often misunderstood, often feared, but the complexities of the erotic imagination are eve more so. We can (and do) create rules for the regulation and social control of erotic behavior; we can (and do) develop social conventions and laws with various punishments for what is considered sexually transgressive behavior. They make us all feel reassured and “safe.” But despite all the energy we invest in limiting erotic practice, erotic imagination travels its own path, most often to the very themes we deem forbidden, bizarre, even perverse. If Eros is the archetype of a rash, irrepressible, rebellious trouble maker, he seems most uncontrollable when he enters the realm of the imagination.

The sensationalist, distorted, hysterical language that dominates the political and social dialogue of erotic art and pornography reflect the cultural fear and confusion about our essential erotic natures. We equate the symbolic content of our erotic fantasies, dreams, or works of art with the literal intention to enact the fantasy. In no other area of imagination do we so fear confusing fantasy with reality.

For example, if you wake up from a dream of leaping off a cliff and suddenly soaring effortlessly through space, you would not imagine that you’re in danger of killing yourself by leaping off a cliff while awake. However, if you dream of being sexual in a subversive way, say by being sexual with a prohibited partner (the person next door, a colleague at work, a family member), you may likely fear there is something dangerously wrong with you. If a man fantasizes of being at a luxurious estate, surrounded by opulence and all the creature comforts, he may likely smile at the creativeness of his imagination. But if he becomes similarly excited imagining elaborate scenes in which one glamorous woman after another desires to have wild sex with him (as is typical of male masturbatory fantasy), he will probably be told (or tell himself) that he is a sex addict, a potential rapist, someone with an unconscious desire to dominate or degrade women -- someone who should be fundamentally fearful of his sexual desires.

That we perceive and react to sex-related imagination so differently from other forms of creativity is indicative of our culturally programmed and deep-seated fear of pour erotic impulse and its herald, erotic imagination. We experience these as dangerous forces which must be kept reigned in, under constant control, lest they destroy the very foundation of our seemingly rational, orderly lives.

The tragedy and harm is that when we impose reasonableness on our erotic desires and dreams, or ascribe literal accuracy on erotic fantasies, photographs, and art, we deny our erotic complexity, and lose a huge part of erotic self empowerment, energy, and spontaneity. We become “good” boys and girls, seeking the approval of our parents, friends, society, but at a tremendous cost to ourselves. If we cannot tolerate our forbidden erotic thoughts and desires, if we cannot trust ourselves to separate fantasy from reality, thought from overt action, when it comes to erotic and sexual matters, we by necessity from much of the natural wellspring of erotic power.

It is possible, however, to step back from this culturally exaggerated fear of eros and to ask real questions about and to explore how erotic fantasy and imagination actually function. We can learn to address the erotic imagination on its own irrational, symbolic, and psychological terms. When we do this, we then become capable of appreciating not only our own fantasies but also the works of erotic art and literature, just as we appreciate other creative works -- separating fiction from fact, art from life. By creating psychological space for fantasy as fantasy, we can begin to understand and enjoy how wonderfully creative our erotic imagination can be, and to derive pleasure from the assorted fruits of its inventiveness.

Until recently, before the advent of the internet, there were two major public forums for sexually explicit imagination. The most widespread is commercial pornography -- the traditional medium in our culture for the public exploration of sexual fantasy. Because we have ghettoized the creation of sexually arousing material to an underground outlaw subculture, commercial pornography is, for the most part, formulaic, trivializing, and filled with gender and racial stereotypes, and almost universally male-oriented. I should note, however, that with the advent of the video and the internet, pornography has become more widespread with an audience that includes almost as many women as men, and it has (admittedly to a very small degree) become more joyous and sex friendly. Besides, the biggest consumers of video porn (in the U.S.) are people from some of the most religiously repressive Red States. Cyber interactions have also served to change pornography with “cougars” and men exchanging sexually explicit photographs, expanding the form in terms of amateur photographs.

However, I feel the most important development of public sexual expression in recent years has blossomed, is quite distinct from commercial pornography in its aesthetics, its content, and its general perception of sexuality and gender roles, and also its network of distribution. We have begun to see for the first time some measure legitimacy being given to sexual art, writing, and photography. My friend and poet, Puma Perl, for example, explores the outer fringes of the erotic imagination in her performance pieces, and she’s not alone. These new forms of sexual art go beyond pornographic conventions to offer complex, creative expressions of sexual themes and practices. Although serious artistic respect for sex-related art is still incubating, increasing numbers of talented artists and writers have begun to address sexual issues in their work, to defend the legitimacy and importance of a wide range of sexual themes, and to wrestle with the often elusive artistic questions raised by the erotic imagination.

The issues addressed by such artist are crucial in a growing cultural climate of sexual and political intolerance. Despite the current obstacles, growing numbers of artists are challenging the sexual status quo and do we ever need it. The alternative is to devolve into a postmodern nightmare of a sexually repressive (and dangerous) Victorian era. And may the gods help us all if that happens.

Love,

Eddie

The Friday Sex Blog [Sexual Ignorance]

¡Hola! Everybody…
Wisconsin governor, Scott Walker, is on tape (as part of a prank) as stating that he was considering planting thugs in that state’s labor protests in order to foment violence (with the intent of undermining the public's First Amendment rights). I’m not that surprised a conservative would consider such an action or that he would rationalize it. After all, it’s part of the conservative authoritarian mindset. What I find obscene is that almost no one in the mainstream news considers this worthy of a sustained and prolonged investigation.

Later today, my reflections on Wisconsin in particular and US social policy in general will be posted at Subversify, the online magazine that actually has the cojones to publish anything I write and which offers an alternative and (yes) subversive, perspective from the corporate media.

The following entries are true…

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-=[ They Actually Said That ]=-

When the subject is punishment, the predicate is religion

“I personally object to vaccinating children against a disease that 100% preventable with proper sexual behavior.” -- Leslie Unruh, director, National Abstinence Clearing House (link)

“If a woman wants to give birth to a healthy baby, Planned Parenthood kicks her out with a referral slip. After all, adoption is not where the money is.” -- Douglas Scott, president, Life Decisions International (link)

“The federal courts, and the Supreme Court in particular, have “systematically attacked Christianity.” -- Tony Perkins, president, Family Research Council (link)

“America must pursue a civil society that will democratically embrace its essential moral duties, including… caring for children born and unborn.” -- Proclamation of President George W. Bush, declaring January 18^th “Sanctity of Life Day” (link)

“Course materials and instruction relating to sexuality or sexually transmitted diseases should include emphasis, provided in a factual manner and from a public health perspective, that homosexuality is not a lifestyle acceptable to the general public and that homosexual conduct is a criminal offense.” -- Texas Health and Safety Code 163.002 (link)

“The Parents Television Council does not censor. The First Amendment was instituted to guarantee precisely the type of activities pursued by the PTC: free speech and disseminating information.” -- Parents Television Council, which pressures the government to remove “objectionable” TV shows from the air (link)

“Hardcore pornography, or material depicting actual sex acts, promotes the idea that human beings can be sexually used and abused without consequences. If we tolerate pornographic material that encourages people to indulge their darkest sexual fantasies, we cannot act surprised when millions do so in real life as well.” -- Daniel Weiss, media analyst for Focus on the Family: “Porn Feeds Human Trafficking,” Denver Post, Op-Ed, January 27, 2006

“We need to yell it to the top of the rooftops that these condoms we’re sending down to you don’t protect you… [You] have a false sense of security. So I think we’re sending the wrong message when we use taxpayer dollars to give condoms out to these kids and we don’t tell them ‘By the way, you’ll probably be dead at age 24 by cervical cancer. But we’re giving you condoms, so go do your thing.’ To me, abstinence is the only way.” -- Rep. Jo Ann Davis (R-VA), at Congressional Hearing on Cervical Cancer and HPV (link)

“When two people of the same sex… adopt children… I think what you have in many respects is state-sanctioned child abuse.” -- Radio Host Janet Parshall, on CNN’S Larry King Live (link)

Porn users “giver lame justification for their behavior like: ‘It’s harmless,’ or ‘Everybody’s doing it’ By doing this they ignore the effect their problem is having on people around them. This behavior is not OK, it’s not even almost OK. This habit is a perverse and ridiculous intrusion into [a] relationship.” -- Dr. Phil McGraw (link)

“[Journalists and politicians like you] are in what we call the reality-based community, people who believe that solutions emerge from the judicious study of discernible reality. That’s not the way the real world works anymore.” -- Senior advisor to President Bush, in conversation with journalist David Susskind (link)

“I’m always a little irritated when I hear the criticism of abstinence, because abstinence is absolutely 100 percent effective in eradicating a sexually transmitted disease.” -- Former First Lady Laura Bush, apparently utterly clueless to the fact that abstinence fails in 88% of teens who pledge it (link)

If the public can be convinced that condoms offer certain -- or nearly certain -- protection from pregnancies and STDs, then the [proponents] can argue that the only thing holding people back from free sexual expression is outdated, irrelevant religious restrictions.” -- Focus on the Family, on why they must discourage trust in condoms (link)

Finally...

“This is just a short note to express my heartfelt thanks to you and the entire staff of Focus on the Family fro your help and support during the past few challenging months. I would also greratly appreciate it if you would convey any appreciation to the good people from all parts of the country who wrote to tell me that they were praying for me and for my family during this period. As long as I serve on the Supreme Court I will keep in mind the trust that has been placed on me. I hope that we will have an opportunity to meet personally at some point in the future. In the meantime my entire family and I hope that you and the Focus on the Family staff know how much we appreciate all that you have done.” -- supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito, to James Dobson after Alito had been confirmed to the Supreme Court (link)

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Yes, these resourceful idiots actually did say all of the above.

My name is Eddie and I’m in recovery from civilization…

Update: I've added a couple more quotes and I've added links (where possible) to all the quotes above so that readers can gauge for themselves whether the comments are properly contextualized.

The Friday Sex Blog [Ode to a Woman's Behind]

-=[ In Praise of Women’s Behinds ]=-

Free yo ass, your mind will follow...

The female ass, that most unorthodox of altars, to be worshiped on one’s knees.

Indeed, the ancient Greeks revered the buttocks as being an aspect of the divine and portrayed them enthusiastically in exquisitely sculpted marble. With the coming of the centuries-long Christian war on Eros, however, the depiction of the nude figure became a crime, thrown into the shadows (along with anything having to do with evolved human activities) of the repressive Dark Ages.

Then, in the fifteenth century, Renaissance artists once more raised the bottom to loftier heights only to have it once again banished by the prudish Victorians, who found the body so revolting, they considered even bathing immodest.

Today, the bottom has once again been salvaged from the repressive excesses of religiosity with dress designers now decreeing that the ass should once again be the focus of attention, and no dedicated fashionista can afford to neglect the view from the rear -- or this newfound, well-rounded appraisal of it.

Buttocks date from time immemorial. They appeared when humankind conceived the idea of standing up on their hind legs and remaining there -- one of the most crucial moments in our evolution since the buttock muscles then underwent considerable development. More importantly, this act resulted in the freeing of our ancestor’s hands and the engagement of the skull on the spinal column was modified, which in turn allowed the brain (specifically the prefrontal cortex) to develop. Therefore, it would not be wrong to point out that our buttocks were at least partially responsible for the early emergence of the brain and certainly influenced its evolution. Our asses, it follows, freed our minds.

Of all the existing primates only the human species possesses hemispherical buttocks which project prominently from the body. Other primates have been described as “apes with flat buttocks.” Which is to make a mockery of the ass. Therefore, the emergence of the buttocks coincides with the erect stance and walking on two legs which, according to anthropologists, goes back three or four million years.

The fact remains, of course, that our ancestor’s buttocks did not resemble ours simply because they stood upright. Much time and evolution would have to transpire before hairy and not so noticeable buttocks would’ve evolved into the naked, smooth, and soft buttocks that we love so much today.

When a female ape wanted to send a “sexual signal” to a mate, she showed him her hind quarters. This is an interesting note for many of the female of the species of ape possess bottoms which light up, becoming bright red and swollen as the time of ovulation approaches. And rutting generally occurs when the females display their organs in the state of maximum dilation. With the human female it is quite different. Her bottom does not swell with the menstrual cycle: it remains permanently protuberant (swollen). And therein lies just one of the many beauties of the female behind: she is always ready for the male and can mate even when she cannot concieve. This last fact has been a thorn in the side of Christians for a very long time.

From an aesthetic perspective, there is probably no more pleasing architecture than a woman’s behind in all its glory. The convex/ concave contrast between the subtle flaring of an impossibly slim waist flaring into the well-rounded twin orbs of female posterior flesh cannot be found elsewhere. Then there is the cleft -- mysterious, dark, the gateway to sin itself. And if one were to explore more closely, one could grasp a glimpse of the fleshy lips of a moist and receptive vagina. It is no wonder why a woman’s ass -- thrown upwards into the air, naked and vulnerable -- is one of the most erotic and subversive of human acts.

Love,

Eddie

The Friday Sex Blog [Sex as Prayer]

¡Hola! Everybody…
OK! Let me just say that I don't give a flying fuck about any royal wedding/ engagement, or WhatTheFuckEver!

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-=[ Sex as Prayer ]=-

A woman's behind -- an altar to be worshiped on ones knees...

Most people raised as Christians would consider the melding of sex and spirituality a heresy. I say, take it up with the man you call your God. After all, according to dogma, He invented everything in six days (even He had to rest). LOL

Seriously, most of us compartmentalize our lives. For too many people sex is something they do in the darkened chambers of their shame.

I would submit that fucking is the highest for of prayer any couple (married or not) can offer to the Divine. As an expression of the Universal Principle, it creates unity and joy which are surely signs of a Divine presence. As an expression of the couple’s love for one another, it is the deepest affirmation that love is their work. With such power to elicit the presence of the Divine, I have to wonder why there is so little written or taught about sex as prayer. This is especially puzzling as I browse the aisles of bookstores brimming with books on centering prayer, charismatic prayer, holistic prayer, The Jesus prayer, blah blah blah…

Don’t answer that question, it’s a rhetorical device. The answer is found in the Church’s two-thousand-year anti-sex campaign. Christianity sees the flesh as the domain of the devil -- as sinful -- and could never be integrated into Christian spirituality. On another, less obvious level, the neglect of sex is an expression of a deep-rooted fear: the fear of mystery. Due to an irrational dogma that has lost much of its relevance, we intentionally exclude this mystery from our daily lives.

Essentially, we have chosen to live in fear and anxiety rather than face the mystery. We push sex into the dark recesses of our psyches where it then becomes deviant -- a dark and twisted power that controls our motivations even as we deny its existence. We do this at our own peril.

We will fight tooth and nail, for example, to cover a statue’s breasts, but stay mum when our children are subjected to watching literally thousands of murders before they reach the age of seven. Tits are evil, but watching a human being gunned down senselessly is kewl.

The naked form is evil, but subjecting our children to endless stream of advertisements created by marketing experts for the sole purpose of making our children mindless consumers is OK.

Our escape from the mystery of sex has placed our lives in jeopardy. We think we fear loss of freedom, fear the terrorists, or fear unending war, but the reality we fear more than all enemies real or imagined, is the reality of sex and the surrender it demands.

It’s no wonder the most predominant characteristic of our age is impotence, Not that we are without power, but that we experience ourselves individually and collectively as powerless. The consequences of this powerless are seen everywhere. We have an abundance of food, yet millions go hungry. We have the largest population I the history of the world and yet many of us go lonely. We have sex but only as a scratch for an ego itch -- sex without substance. And I’m not talking about casual vs. committed sex. Both forms of sex can be liberating -- sex is essentially a liberating force -- I know too many people in committed relationships who have “empty calorie” sex.

No, what we have is the old bitter fear which breeds more and more weapons of mass destruction. We are afraid. We fear love. We fear sex. We have forgotten how to dance.

If you want to know the way out, sexual union points the way.

Sexual union invites us as lovers to go beyond a society and a self that views its accomplishments, its goals, its vision of reality, its technical achievements, as ends in themselves -- as idols. Sexual union offer a path where we gain a perspective of what is lasting and what is temporary. Sexual union is mutual surrender to they mystery and the heart of human life and love. Sex is the reminder that we are not the center of the universe: The Divine is the center.

Love,

Eddie

The Friday Sex Blog [The Culture Wars]

¡Hola! Everybody…
Well, the right wing Brownshirts are already out in full force and the elections is still a few days off. One young progressive activist had her head stomped and another democratic operative was taken down and arrested by goons paid for by tax payer money. You can be sure the bigots will be out in full force on Election Day trying to intimidate people of color. All the more reason you should go out there and vote, people. The local elections are more important, have more of an impact than the nationals. Don’t be a fuckin pendej@ -- VOTE!

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-=[ The War on Sex ]=-

Speaking of elections, one phrase that continually pops up is “culture war.” This familiar expression is actually part of the problem. You see, the phrase suggests there are two sides of equal strength lined up, honoring more or less the same rules of engagement, wanting to conquer each other.

But what is called a “culture war” is nothing like that at all. Those who fear and hate sexuality (erotophobes) are attacking those who appreciate or tolerate sexuality (erotophiles). Erotophiles are not attempting to force erotophobes to live more sexually adventurous lives. In fact, erotophiles aren’t trying to make the erotophobes do anything they don’t want to do. However, erotophobes demand that both sides -- everyone -- live according to their anti-sex (erotophobic) values. For example, erotophiles say, “If you don’t want to go to a nude beach, don’t go, but don’t shut it down to prevent me from having that choice.” Erotophobes respond, “I don’t want to go to a nude beach, and I don’t want you to have the option of going either, so it must be closed.” In a similar way, erotophobes want to control and mitigate the sexual rights of those they fear. For example, erotophiles say, “If you’re against gay marriage, don’t marry one.” Erotophobes respond by waging campaigns of hate against the LGBT community.

While erotophobes recognize there’s a huge range of opportunities for erotic stimulation, satisfaction, and imagination, they want to deny everyone, not just themselves. Ironically, erotophobes (like most conservatives) claim to be the victims in this culture war.

They say they are the ones who are being attacked, their values undermined, and their way of life destroyed. From their paranoiac perspective, they see so-called indecent entertainment, changing fashions, recent court decisions, internet access, and a range of contraceptive technologies as an intrusion -- as being force-fed sex. They can’t, they wail, turn on a TV, go to a mall, boot up a computer, or even go to work without being assaulted by sexual images. Furthermore, they claim, even when they are not being literally confronted, they are still forced to abide others’ sexual activity next door and all over America -- behavior that is immoral, disgusting, and sinful.

I have no doubt this is true for them. However it is irrelevant to the governance of the U.S. Nowhere in our founding documents is there mention of regulating anything considered immoral, sinful, or disgusting. On the contrary, the United States was founded on the idea that people should be able to choose what to do and with whom to associate based on their personal values and ideals -- not those of a king, feudal lord, or religious hierarchy. Nor even, as James Madison declared, the tyrannical majority in their own town, state, or nation.

When erotophobes demand that we eliminate entertainment, fashion, medical technology, bedroom activity, and businesses that are in their estimation “immoral” or “sinful,” they are calling for a dismantling of the core values our nation was founded on. Such changes would result in governance that would bring us closer to modern Saudi Arabia, the former Soviet Union, the Taliban in Afghanistan, and Nazi Germany.

Historically, the U.S. has tried to balance the rights of individuals and community responsibility. Therefore, for example, while you enjoy the freedom of speech, you don’t have the right to yell “fire” in a crowded theater. Another fundamental U.S. is that the law should address actual crime and actual victims, and it should be drafted in ways that limit negative unintended consequences when solving a problem.

Today’s culture war seeks to disrupt that balance, and it has already succeeded in many ways. Historically, it was against the law for someone to actually kill your cow, or doing something makes you worried about someone killing your cow. Attempting to criminalize abortion isn’t enough for conservatives, they also attempt to ban over-the-counter availability of emergency contraception, saying such availability would “encourage promiscuity.” Progressives respond with scientific data that clearly shows it won’t, and in that way, one more battle is joined. Erotophobes respond that (as is usual) they have no data, they have “concerns” and “feelings,” which are now considered seriously in public policy debates.

Although our country makes cars safer in case of accidents, has school athletes wear helmets in case they fall awkwardly, and establishes poison control centers in case toddlers get into cleaning supplies, these sexual jihadists don’t want to reduce the consequences of unauthorized, unprotected, or unfortunate sex. They say that doing so encourages bad sexual choices. That’s like saying seat belts encourage dangerous driving and poison centers encourage sloppy parenting practices.

Forget that children who learn abstinence-only have as much sex -- only they use condoms less often. Erotophobes have manipulated the American public into fighting sexual expression, not sexual ignorance or poor sexual decision-making.

Let’s be clear, a large part of the culture wars is really about the pathological need to control sex. Erotophobes fear sex. They fear sexual expression, sexual exploration, sexual arrangements, sexual privacy, sexual choice, sexual entertainment, sexual health and sexual pleasure. They want you to fear it as well. Today’s conservavie/ fundamentalist political movements present a horrifically distorted picture of sexuality. It’s a narrative of danger and fear; a narrative of sin and, therefore, of self-destructiveness. While erotophobes typically describe their fear in socially acceptable terms (i.e., “protecting children,” “defending marriage”), what they really fear is sexuality as they understand it.

The outcome of these battles will determine how our children will live for decades to come. It will determine what books they will be allowed to read, what they will be taught to fear, what they know about their bodies, and how much control they will have over their own fertility.

Millions of Americans are afraid of sex. Some admit it, some don’t. Millions more hate sex, and some have declared war on it. America’s pluralism is despised by fundamentalists around the world -- including those right here on our soil. If you’re interested in sex, you’re part of this war whether you like it or not. If you watch TV, use a sex toy, go to the movies, need an abortion, enjoy dirty online chat, want a physician trained in sexual medicine, or have a child in school, the guns of the culture war and the war on sex will be pointed at you.

It is imperative that we begin asking the right questions, right now, because the answers will matter.

Love,

Eddie

Repression is not Morality

¡Hola! Everybody...
Unless you’re living outside the USA, you have by now been treated to countless stories of Eddie Long’s “alleged” sexual predatory behavior. He is a major religious figure, known for his staunch, homophobic views and conservative, “family values” stance. the accusations leveled against him have rocked Christianity and the Black Church in particular, with many expressing shock, denial, and anger at his actions. This post is not about Eddie Long specifically. It is, however, an attempt to understand the roots of sexual repression, it’s consequences, and why it’s always bound to fail.

* * *

-=[ The Consequences of Sexual Suppression]=-

Repression is not morality

First, let me point out that individuals who score highly on psychological metrics measuring homophobia, often demonstrate an attraction to homosexual acts. A university study seems to confirm the belief that most homophobic men have repressed homosexual desires:

The study showed that the men who scored highest on a homop[hobic measure were most sexually aroused by gay porn. (An alternative, but much less likely, explanation is that the homophobic men's erections were caused by anxiety during the experiment.) I believe that any attempt to repress Eros (which is part of our humanity) relegates it to the dark recesses of our collective psyche where it becomes warped and controls our behaviors.

Eddie Long’s behavior is not the work of the “devil” but the consequence of sexual repression. The correct clinical term here should be reaction formation, but for my purposes here I'll term it repression.

From birth we are taught to be ashamed of and fearful of sex -- all of us to some degree are repressed muthafuckas. Even those of us who claim to be sexually “free” oftentimes use language to describe that experience that leaves me wondering. In many cases it’s a past framed as remorse and “youthful indiscretions.” This isn’t the language of sexual freedom, it’s repression personified. People mistakenly link sexual repression with lack of sexual activity. Nothing could be further from the truth. Repression is a defense mechanism we use to push things out of our conscious awareness where they often gain total subconscious control over our actions.

I have traveled to many places and I have never come up against the sheer depth of sexual hang-ups that I confront with in this society. We fear, loathe, and at the same time crave sex. We are outraged if, god forbid, a child sees a breast (though there is no evidence nudity is harmful to children), but have nothing to say when we willingly allow our children to be subjected to literally tens of thousands of violent images and marketing strategies aimed at making them mindless consumers (see the most recent example of the Katy Perry Sesame St. flap).

I have previously written about the two-thousand year Christian campaign against sex. Add to that three centuries of Puritanism and... welcome to sex in America.

Eroticism is considered an outlaw energy in this culture. I don’t know exactly why. Perhaps it’s because it’s a reminder of taboo Goddess worship, or because of the sheer power of sexual energy, or because limitations on sexual behavior made sense thousands of years ago. Whatever the reason, Eros is a forbidden fruit and our society spends huge sums of its precious resources every minute of every day to undermine, co-opt, channel, manipulate, ridicule, and distort it.

And we all pay a price for this.

When religion fails to recognize our basic human need for pleasure and uses its power to influence what is considered normal in order to repress our God-given right for nurturing and sensual and erotic pleasure, the consequences are violence and predatory behavior. When we diminish sex to its lowest form and ignore the vital sustenance we can draw from the sexual rainbow of playful, loving, and intimate union, we distort our human nature.

Numerous studies of child abuse, for example, indicate that parents who abuse their children were often deprived of physical affection during childhood, and as adults experience extremely unsatisfying sexual relationships. Studies of child-rearing practices across cultures, and evidence of neurological damage in anti social humans demonstrate that deprivation of bodily pleasure during infancy and adolescence and the repression of pleasure promote adult violence. A case in point is the U.S. Compared to other industrialized democracies, The United States has some of the most repressive legal sanctions against sexuality, and yet we have the highest sexual crime rates. That’s a fact, not a belief.

Patriarchal religions (i.e., Christianity, Judaism, and Muslim) that emphasize a high God who actively punish deviations in human behavior commonly endorse anti-women, anti-sex and anti-pleasure value systems. As part of their anti-sexual values, these religions promote negative attitudes about the physical nurturance of infants and children. They also severely punish adolescents and adults who engage in erotic pleasures considered outside the norm.

Deprivation of body pleasure throughout life -- but especially during the formative periods of infancy, childhood, and adolescence -- is very closely related to the amount of warfare and violence in a society. Conversely, societies that promote nurturing in child-rearing, that are comfortable with the body, and with sexuality and pleasure, produce adults who have little sexual dysfunction, who promote gender and social equality, and a society that does not glorify slavery or war.

There is a strong argument for the notion that failure to celebrate the pleasures of the Divine presence in our erotic lives creates the compulsion to conquer and achieve pleasure elsewhere. One can see a clear causal link between patriarchal (Father-like) religions that deny the power we draw from erotic pleasure and the anti-sex, anti-pleasure belief systems of religious fundamentalism and fascism.

Religious fundamentalism of any type relies on literal and patriarchal interpretations of texts that determine what rules guide human behavior and spell out punishments for those who deviate from those rules. Fundamentalism thrives when individuals become terrified of thinking outside cultural norms. For me, fundamentalism is patriarchy gone mad, fascism is the ultimate expression of father-dominance. Within this framework, moralizing and condemnation become more important than celebration and play. Self-centeredness and a preoccupation with power and laws that maintain it become a substitute for adventure, pleasure, wonder, and a living, spiritual ritual.

One only has to look at the Christian rationalization of slavery. Christians used the bible to justify slavery, for example. Look at the early Christian support for Hitler which agreed on his attacks on contraception, pornography, and sexual permissiveness. More recently, Christians have supported neo-fascist attacks on gay marriage, sex shops, and abortion clinics.

But it’s not all gloom and doom. we’re in the midst of a tidal change terrifying to many people around the world. There are fundamentalist forces clamoring for a return to the “good old times.” There are forces calling for a return to their ways (their “country”)You know the good old times: the times when women were little better than property, where people of color “knew their place,” and gays were kept in the closet.

There is a culture war in full effect in these United States and there are those who want to drag us back to the Dark Ages where dialogues about sexual identity and alternatives to sexual monogamy didn’t exist. Fortunately, we can’t go back -- as much as these ignoramuses would like. We are in what the famous anthropologist Margaret Meade called a prefigurative stage. All the myths and symbols that gave meaning and direction to our culture have lost much of their significance (and with good reason), and we are only beginning to create a new cosmology, a culture that respects sex, pleasure, and sensuality, new myths and icons that provide relevant models for a new consciousness of ourselves and of the earth.

The other option, to cling to an outmoded book full of outdated myths, is to choose to destroy ourselves. and you can get a glimpse of that destruction personified in the Eddie Longs, the Taggarts, and Swaggarts of the world...

Eddie

The Friday Sex Blog [Tantra]

¡Hola! Everybody…
Before I forget, please be sure to check out my article on the importance of stories over at Subversify.com (click here). There's something there for everyone:

What's America coming to? The David thinks it Oligarchy; W.D. Noble covers the Koch brothers, the Tea Party, and a future America; Edward-Yemíl Rosario reminds us why stories are important; A.B. Thomas defends gamers everywhere; A collection of Poems from Bill the Butcher and Karla Fetrow continues her Luke Maverick series in "Clovia" all at Subversify.com

Apparently, a tornado touched down here in Brooklyn not too far from my neighborhood. I was hanging out in the City when it all came down and didn’t notice anything…

Today’s blog photo contributor wishes to remain anonymous, but GAWD! I can fall in love with an ass like that! What an altar that would make... If I woke up to an ass like that, my first act every morning would be to kiss it. LOL

* * *

-=[ Tantra ]=-
Every woman’s nature is to be a priestess, to be an initiator. Only when a man knows how to give her pleasure will she be radiant, devoted, loving, satisfied, and able to be in the fullness of the whole relationship.
-- Margot Anand

I keep trying to write a piece on Goddess worship and it just doesn’t come out… What follows is a very brief and very inadequate attempt to elaborate on tantra.

Sex lies at the root of life, and it is crucial that we learn reverence for it. By reverence I don’t mean to say that sex should only be practiced under certain conditions and only with certain individuals. By reverence I mean that we must come to the realization that sex is an energy – a divine and transformative energy – and that we must learn to revere and cultivate that energy.

Orgasm brings us closer to the divine than any other experience. This is why organized religions have always tried to control sex: because ecstatic people are a free people. In the moment of orgasm, a bonding between the right and left hemispheres of the brain occurs. When the creative, intuitive right side of the brain fuses with the center of logic and thinking on the left side, an akashic field (“zero-point”) of total connection can be accessed. The ego walls come tumbling down, time and space cease to exist, and you become one with energy and consciousness.

This form of sexual practice transcends mere ego needs so often heard in popular culture: songs wailing about “Baby, I need you,” and “I can’t live without you.” Sabotaged by ego needs (the “Mini Me”), sex becomes a quick exercise in tension and release. It obstructs the free flow of energy.

Sexuality is a very natural instinct, a powerfully creative force. From the tantric perspective, each of us can put that force to work in the service of healing, transformation, and the realization of our potentials. Yet, in many ways, we are conditioned to think about sex that confuses us. We straddle the two extremes of viewing sex as something natural that should not be interfered with, or the perception of sex as something hidden, dirty, and taboo. Of course, that last part is what sometimes makes it so interesting and brings violence and exploitation into sex. In this country, we find it so difficult even to talk about sex without defining it in deviant terms, we have to fight through all the cultural taboos to have a good time, it seems.

I write this Friday Sex blog mostly because I feel the damage caused by the condemnation of sex can’t begin to be measured. Instead of celebrating sex as a creative force, we turn it into a shameful, guilt-ridden affair. Religions want to make people believe that a priest is necessary in order to have a relationship with the divine. They discourage any direct attempt to have an experience of “God” on their own. Religious institutions, for the most part, do not want us to wake up to our natural ecstasy. The moment they wake up, a person becomes a free thinker and for those in power, a free thinker is a dangerous individual.

Tantra developed as a rebellion against the repressive moralistic codes of organized religions in India around 5000 b.c.e. It developed particularly as a response to the widespread notion that sexuality had to be denied in order to attain spiritual enlightenment. Tantra means “weaving,” in the sense of bringing together the many and often contradictory aspects of the self into one harmonious whole. Tantra also means “expansion,” in the sense that once our own energies are understood and unified, we grow and expand into joy. Truly, Tantra is the “yoga of love.”

Characterized by what the Tibetan Tantric tradition calls crazy wisdom, Tantric masters scandalized mainstream society and were often condemned and persecuted. Crazy Wisdom is a tradition in which the teacher uses paradoxical stories, seemingly absurd questions, and unexpected behavior in order to tease, jolt, and provoke people to drop mainstream conditioning and conventional attitudes so that they may embrace the whole spectrum of life, with no conflict between the sacred and the profane, the spiritual and the sexual.

There’s no way I could do justice to the Tantric vision in a one-page Word document, but I will say that the Tantric vision accepts everything. There’s nothing forbidden in Tantra. Everything that a person experiences, regardless of whether it is judged as good or bad, is an opportunity for learning. For example, a situation in which you experience sexual frustration is not viewed negatively in tantra, it is viewed as an opportunity for learning.

The best way I’ve heard tantra described is through the use of the metaphor of weeds. While weeds, if left unattended can bring a garden to ruin, one can also use weeds to fertilize the soil and make it richer. In this way, Tantra utilizes energies usually judged as negative as a path toward growth.

I guess I will have to write a part two on this tantra thingee. LOL

According to Tantra, sex is first a matter of energy, and Tantra views energy as the movement of life. For example, the nucleus and electrons of an atom have a certain rhythmic movement. The same goes for molecules, cells, and organs of the human body. Each organ -- the heart, diaphragm, intestines, lungs, brains -- pulsates to the rhythm of life. The vibrations from these rhythmic movements generate bioelectric currents that stream continuously through the whole body. They also generate energy fields that surround the body, and our moods and emotions generate specific vibrations that alter these energy fields as well.

One last thing, Surrender is an essential aspect of Tantra. There is, however, much confusion about what surrender means. People are suspicious of this term, which is often equated with loss of free will and personal power. In fact, they are confusing surrender with submission, which is (to me) a passive attitude that implies giving up responsibility for one’s behavior. True surrender, at least within the Tantric tradition, is a conscious choice made from free will. It means opening your heart and trusting the person you are with.

Tantra is about wholeness, of embracing everything, because every situation is an opportunity to become more aware about who you are and about how you can expand your capacities. Because Tantra embraces wholeness, it embraces opposites, seeing them not as contradictions but as complements. The concepts of male and female therefore are placed apart, forever divided by a gender gap, but are viewed as part of a continuum that meet and merge in every human being. Tantra recognizes that in each individual there exists both a masculine and feminine quality.

Practice: Cultivating Sexual Energy

Man: Sit comfortably on a pillow with your legs crossed.

Woman: Sit on top, straddling your partner with your legs.

Man: Hold your arms around your partner to support her back.

Looking into each other’s eyes, breathe through the nose down into the belly. It is best if your bellies are touching. With the breath, find the same rhythm. If you desire, you can start to rock your hips in movement with each other. Feel into each other as if wearing the other person’s body.

Man: As you enter your woman, feel your strength entering her as a gift. Fill her with your conscious presence. As soon as you start to feel a buildup of energy in your genitals, stop moving, breathe deeply, and have the intention to spread the concentrated energy throughout the rest of the body. If need be, tell your partner out loud when you need time to recirculate the energy.

Woman: Feel the gift of your man’s energy entering you, receive it in your womb, and draw it up into your heart. Give it back to him as love and nurturing through your breasts. Keep focusing on this as an act of worship and giving. You will inevitably get caught in feelings of physical pleasure. There is no need to try to stop them, but do not get stuck there. You will also get caught in strong personal emotions. Allow them, but go deeper. Allow the gifting to pass throughout, not from you. If you continue circulating the energy and allowing it to give through you, after some time your partner will become an invitation into something vast, something much bigger than the personal.

Man: As you keep giving to her with your body, you will start to feel that you are giving through her, to all women, to all of life.

Woman: As you pour love into your partner through your breasts and your heart, and keep opening your womb to receive more freely in undefended surrender, draw this up into your infinitely open heart, and you will feel through him to all men, to the Divine Source.

Unlike sex that is only for physical pleasure and release, the need to reach orgasm may lessen in this kind of sexual meeting rather than grow. Instead of climaxing in an orgasm, keep circulating the energy until you come to a place of absolute fullness and stillness. Remain there without moving, and feel the great union, one you could never feel alone. This is the union of you and your partner, of masculine and feminine, of energy with itself. When you know union in this way, you come to the realization of why there is life.

Love,

Eddie

The Friday Sex Blog [Relgious Sex]

“… Her truth, her altar,
forms at the
juncture of firm thighs
where a hallowed moistness --
a sticky-sweet dew --
exists solely to quench
my lustful thirst.
It’s where the stuttering
of my lips
offers prayers
from an unknown religion
to forgotten Gods.”

-- Edward-Yemíl Rosario
All rights reserved © 2008

According to The Big Three (Christianity, Judaism, Islam) the erotic impulse -- the world of Eros, the body, and human sexuality -- falls under the domain of Satan. From this perspective, the physical is cast as sinful, bestial. Human sexuality, according to this view, is an obstacle from the lofty hallowed pursuit of God and everything that is good and ethical. From the moment we are born, we are told that the more we open to the erotic impulse, the more we listen and open to the needs of the body, the more we embrace and enjoy our sexual natures, the further we stray from moral rectitude and emotional well-being.

I write this Friday sex blog mostly because I argue that the opposite is true. I submit that the erotic impulse, honored and liberated from the shackles of guilt and organized forces of suppression, is a powerful spiritual path leading to a profound psycho-spiritual awareness. The sex blog is a call for us to stop trivializing the erotic/ sexual world as we so often do, as if sex involved nothing more than sensory stimulation, ego gratification, and the pursuit of an orgasm.

Some of my assumptions are radical. That there is more to sex than the giddy pursuit of carnal pleasure may be hard to accept in the aftermath of the sexual explosion of the 60s and 70s. It was an era when reliable birth control, combined with an awakening feminism, consciousness-raising, and the movements for gay, lesbian, and bisexual liberation released us from some of our legacy of sexual oppression and fear. However, it is my submission that that it is precisely our failure to recognize the depth of the erotic impulse that is at the root of our current dissatisfaction with our sexual nature.

Once we began to shake loose the shackles of sexual repression, we were as the proverbial children in the candy store. In the time of so-called free love, we seemed to want nothing more than to consume as many erotic experiences as we could. We were, after all, sexually starved beings emerging from thousands of years wandering lost in a wasteland into a world of lush jungles bursting with exotic fruit. I was there, and it was an exciting time in the cultural history of Western sexuality, and an important first step in freeing ourselves from the repressive world on the 50s -- the huge, white-picket-fence, clean and tidy, sexual suburbia of post-war America.

Released from sexual repression, we had more sex in more ways (with your mouth, your ass, with a vibrator, within groups, or with people of your own gender). But even as we feasted on the erotic delights we also discovered, even as we celebrated breaking down the political, religious, and cultural inhibitions, that there were limits. The new synthesis, to borrow from Hegel, had created a new antithesis. The crest of the wave was moving faster than the base and there were rocks up ahead. Jumping into the sexual realm, we found ourselves confronted with a landscape we could not have expected and did not know how to interpret.

As much as we would like to trivialize it, we must realize that whenever we play with erotic energy, we engage both emotional and archetypal forces that have their roots in the very heart of who we are as human beings, in how we define ourselves, and how we relate to the world around us. Entering consciously into the erotic world raises issues and feelings, for example, around usually unfulfilled desires rooted in infancy -- desires needing attention and nurture. The erotic impulse touches upon our prenatal memories of being at one with another human being, our ego boundaries, and the blurring of personalities, and notions regarding surrendering control of our behavior. The erotic impulse always raises all the issues related to intimacy: the very human desire to be close to someone else, the fear of becoming lost or smothered, and all the past yearnings, wounds, and disappointments we have experienced. Being sexual confronts us with issues of our worthiness to receive love or pleasure, as well as when and how we want, or don’t want, to extend these ways of caring expressions to another.

Going deeper into the emotions released by deep erotic experiences, we are confronted with anger, passion, even rage which we may find embarrassing or disturbing. We find ourselves dealing with issues of power, and of trust. Going deeper still, erotic experiences takes us down to basic feelings about the balance of chaos and order, and even to an experience that many describe as a direct contact to the Divine.

I view the sexual experience as a valid path for exploring the very meaning of life. I see the attempt to pursue awakening only through an otherworldly mental exercise as wrongheaded and culturally biased. Perhaps it’s a consequence of a spirituality dominated by male spiritual teachers who defined an embodied feminine way of engaging the world as inferior.

Sex is a matter of energy. Once you have learned to experience orgasm as an energy event outside the sexual context, you take responsibility for your well-being in sex. You realize that the true source of your pleasure lies not in your partner but within yourself.

Love,

Eddie