Tank Top Tuesday

You know what’s nice to wear when sailing on a ship? Tank tops. You know what’s nice to see when talking about lesbian “ships?” Tank tops. Life has this beautiful symmetry to it sometimes. Today, in honor of some of our favorite gay lady relationships on TV (maintext, subtext & just the voices in our head varieties), how about a little friendly couple competition? Which pair wears it best? And, to get even more cutthroat, which partner in each pairing wears it best? Total lezzer tank top supremacy awaits, ladies. Choose wisely.

Naya RiveraStill No. 1 in our hearts, minds and pants.

Heather MorrisStill No. 1 in Santana’s heart, mind and pants.

Anna SilkIf you haven’t watched “Lost Girl,” I actually pity you.

Zoie PalmerDr. Hot Pants should always pair them with a tightly fitted tank. Always.

Sara RamirezTank scrubs, think about it Seattle Grace.

Jessica CapshawReally, really think about it Seattle Grace.

Lily LovelessLily, a pint and that smirk – it’s all a growing girl needs to survive.

Kat PrescottThough, of course, a daily supplement of Kat couldn’t hurt either.

Lea MicheleNow this is entirely different kind of “bait girl” look. I approve.

Dianna AgronWearing a tank top is basically the same thing as wearing a “Likes Girls” T-shirt, no?

Angie HarmonThis season on “Rizzoli & Isles,” in addition to wanting more eye sex we should all demand more tank tops.

Sasha AlexanderIsles being a Rizzoli is both confusing and hot. So. Fucking. Hot.

Man, life is just one tough decision after another.

That blessed arrangement

I’ll admit it. I like weddings. I like the idea of standing up in front of the people who matter most in your life and pledging a lifetime of love and commitment to one person. I’m a not-so-secret sap in that way. I also like the open bar and inevitable vat of meatballs in the buffet.

I’m somewhat more ambivalent about having a wedding myself. I’m not diametrically opposed to marriage, and I am absolutely adamant that we should have the legal right to get married. But I’m just not sure if I’ll ever do it myself. I came from a two-parent home where my mom and dad were happily married until the day he died six years ago. So it’s not like I am wary of the institution. I was just never the kid who dreamed about her wedding day. And you know I wasn’t dreaming about the big white dress. (White suit? Maybe.)

But liking weddings and wanting to get married are kind of different things, if you really think about it. Which is why I also like wedding scenes. And movies and TV are really good at wedding scenes. Like, really good. So I’m pretty excited about seeing the Callie and Arizona wedding this Thursday on “Grey’s Anatomy.” I’m excited on a number of levels. One, I like them as a couple (even if I don’t really like their show). Two, I already know they look beautiful in their dresses (seriously, get a load of those dresses – spoilers).

But more importantly, lesbian weddings don’t happen every day on TV. “The Simpsons,” when gay marriage became a Springfield industry. “All My Children,” I think – I don’t watch soaps. And that episode of “Friends” with the crazy hats. So, yeah, we’re due.

It matters seeing our lives reflected back to us with the full range of possibilities. Married, dating. Parents, single. Just like everyone else, we deserve the choices. Too often we’re just background decoration or token friend. Even if I may not necessarily dream about walking down the aisle, some little girl somewhere does. She deserves to see a beautiful bride look over at her beautiful bride on primetime television. So bring on the happily ever after for a change – especially since that ever after won’t be the end of the story.

And, if there’s anything I learned from accidentally staying up and watching the entire royal wedding last week, it’s that as happy as you are for the happy couple, there’s always the possibility that a Hot Sister will show up out of the blue and make you even happier. Like I said, I like weddings – a lot.

My Weekend Crush

I can say when I’m wrong. I’m a big girl. I make mistakes. I misjudge. I prejudge. I can have judgey issues. But when I’m wrong, I’m wrong and I’ll happily call myself on it. And I was wrong about Jessica Capshaw on “Grey’s Anatomy.” Not that I was against her as a person, per se, but I was against the idea of her as a replacement for the dearly departed into The Parking Lot of No Return Brooke Smith. That sort of inconsistent, out-of-nowhere narrative always drives me nuts. At the time it felt like the all-too familiar upgrade to a younger, hotter model. But time has a way of doing its thing with wounds. And Jessica, well, she has been impossible to dislike on “Grey’s.”

I still don’t really watch “Grey’s.” I’ve cut medical dramas (yes, you too, “House) out of my repertoire this year and so I only keep track in occasional late-night YouTube Calzona binges. But I know that they’re good together, and I know that’s a credit to Jessica. What came across as youthful eagerness in her role as poor T&A Nadia on “The L Word” has evolved into mature confidence as Arizona on “Grey’s.” Her Arizona is tough yet tender, secure yet sexy. While I normally loathe to use the word perky, she is a charming perky. She and Callie fit, they make sense (unlike their crazy airport breakup, but that’s a whole other story). So whenever that big smile breaks out over Jessica’s heart-shaped face, well, I’ve never felt better about being wrong about something in my life. She is a good man in a storm, that one. Happy weekend, all.

Kiss and make it better

I had a hell of a weekend. And, to be honest, I’m still recuperating a bit. But there’s one thing that always makes me feel better: Watching girls kissing. So instead of going to bed at a reasonable hour, like I had planned, to try and wake up refreshed and ready for the work week I spent hours engaged in perhaps the biggest time suck known to the universe: Searching for clips of girls kissing on YouTube. And because I’m not greedy, I’m passing my finds on to you. A few of the best TV kisses, just to brighten your Monday.

Callie & Arizona, Grey’s Anatomy

And the trend of lesbian bathroom kisses continues.

Dana & Lara, The L Word

Kisses against lockers…

Naomi & Emily, Skins

…are fucking hot.

Thelma & Cassie, Hex

So, fine, this was just a dream. A very, very good dream.

Alex & Jessica, Mistresses

I know this post is about kisses, but the hottest thing in this clip is the way Anna Torv unbuttons her shirt. There is something tremendously sexy about how she uses her hands, ahem.

p.s. Is it just me, or have the English just had better lesbian kisses on TV? Must be the accents.

Trench Coat Tuesday

So, clearly, it’s a Tuesday. And, yes, Tuesdays are for tank tops. But sometimes a gal needs to mix things up a bit. I figure other articles of clothing should be allowed to stop by every now and then for a visit. Like a timeshare of hotness. So today, the humble tank top makes way for the elegant trench coat. The iconic piece of clothing is as practical as it is promising. That great promise, of course, is simple: That there will be only smooth skin and sin waiting underneath. For example, on Naomi Watts the trench says both a) I’m wearing a jacket in case things get nippy on our car ride and b) I’m wearing nothing underneath to ensure things get nipply after our ride. See, change can be good, or bad – in the someone has been a very, very bad girl sense.

Emily DeschanelMy what nice, um, “Bones” structure you have. I know – groan.

Mariska HargitayIf you get flashed by a cop, who do you call? If it’s Mariska, everyone.

Kate WinsletCold outside, hot everywhere else.

Anna Torv

Just ignore Joshua Jackson, I do on “Fringe” anyway.

Megan FoxEver since she got canned from “Transformers 3,” I’ve liked her a lot more. A lot.

Jessica CapshawDear Shonda Rhimes: Next year, please consider incorporating a trench coat into next season’s mandatory Calzona make-up sex scenes. Just a thought.

Jodie Foster

See, you’ve forgotten all about dumb old tank tops already.