Shaq Keeping Busy; Beats Venus Williams in Oreo-eating Contest

Venus Williams finally met her match in Shaquille O'Neal at a gym in Manhattan yesterday.  One of the world's best tennis players' team lost to the newly retired NBA star's crew in an Oreo-eating contest at the Game Day Challenge sponsored by the cookie company.

O'Neal played Williams one-on-one in basketball and tennis but the highlight was the cookies-and-milk event.

Williams took the loss in stride.

"Shag got lucky today," she joked.  "But it was really fun."

Shaq didn't gloat about his victory though.

"She's fabulous," he said.  "She's always been a great athlete."

Oreo is promoting its new "Triple Double Oreo" which it introduced in August.

Those cookies just keep getting bigger and bigger, don't they?

Shaq Yuks it Up on Conan O'Brien's Late Night Show

Shaquille O'Neal's appearance on Conan O'Brien's late night talk show last night began with the 7-foot-1 former NBA player walking out onto the stage donning a Conan look-a-like red wig.  Hilarious.  Then the 7-foot-1 Shag then proceeded to maul Conan side-kick Andy Richter on the guest couch and later tried squeezing his 300-pound frame into a little go-kart for a  race with the host.  Let's put it mildly to the big guy-- none of it really worked.

Fans of Coco-- what does that mean?-- were rolling in the aisles and the two Big O's were slapsticking themselves silly,  but it was the same old Shaq routine.

 The four-time NBA champion, who never met a camera he didn't like, appeared on the TBS show as a cross-promotion for his new gig on TV.  Shaq had been hired by TBS sister station TNT as an NBA analyst.

The charming O'Neal is no stranger to the small screen and has appeared on Saturday Night Live and even had his own reality show, but some of his shtick is getting thinner than Conan himself.  What diet has that guy been on?

Even his first appearance as an analyst on TNT wasn't without controversy after the mumbling Shaq took a personal shot at Miami Heat player Chris Bosch after Shaq's former NBA championship team  lost in the NBA Finals. 

Superman (or whatever name O'Neal goes by these days) may not be a Hubie Brown (at least he's more appealing to the eye) in the analyst department, but Shaq doesn't take himself seriously and, if you can understand one out of every three words he says, O'Neal is sometimes pretty funny-- and not in a "Shazam" kind of way.

Ron Artest Bringing Comedy Act To New York City

Ron Artest is preparing to take us into his wacky world of weirdness and whimsy by bringing "Ron Artest - The Ultimate Comedy Tour" to New York City this summer.  The Los Angeles Lakers small-forward will host four comedy shows at Caroline's on Broadway on July 15 and 16.

Right after getting swept by the Dallas Mavericks, it seems only natural for Artest, the Queens, NY native and the NBA's reigning class clown, to come home and try his hand at making people laugh with him and not at him.

After all,  his embarrassing play in the second-round playoff was pretty comical.  Taking a cue from that other L.A. funny man Charlie Sheen, the well-traveled basketball star might now want to call his show "Losing."

The 31 year-old Artest could even take the show on the road.  Lord knows he's already made controversial stops with the Bulls, Pacers, Kings and Rockets.  What's another Laugh Factory in Toronto? Detroit would be a blast.  Just imagine the heckling when he reminds Piston fans about the 'Brawl in the Palace.'

The out-spoken former-St. John's star is no stranger to the spotlight or making us laugh--mostly unintentionally.  Here's a sampling of his off-the-backboard humor.

When he joined the Lakers, Artest took '37' for his jersey number as a tribute to Michael Jackson whose "Thriller" album was "#1 on 'Billboard' for 37 weeks."  Cerebral stuff.   Reminds me of Steven Wright.

Then there was the one about thanking his shrink on national TV, right after the Lakers won the NBA Championship last year.  Richard Lewis anyone?

If Artest doesn't tickle your funny bone, he may break it.  Just ask the Mavericks little J.J. Barea how a Ron Artest punchline--I mean clothesline--feels.

With his Queensbridge Projects upbringing, Artest's comedy-stylings might be a little bit more rough around the edges than edgy.  It's an acquired taste.  Like Carrot Top on steroids.

The small forward's comedy goddesses will include local morning radio DJ's and pals according to the New York Daily News.  No porn stars or hookers in this extravaganza--just a laff-riot.   Hey, here's one.  What do the Lakers and a Japanese steak house have in common?  They both have aged Kobe.  Pure gold, Jerry, pure gold.

We can only hope that Artest starts rapping during the show.  Now, that would be really hilarious.

Where's Shaq when you need him?  No, Really.  Where is he?

Carmelo Anthony Set To Appear On "Saturday Night Live"

Carmelo Anthony will hone his comedic chops on "Saturday Night Live" tomorrow.  According to the New York Post,  'Melo will make a guest appearance on the live show to be hosted by Elton John. 

"SNL" executive-producer Lorne Michaels was spotted courtside at Monday night's Knick game against the Orlando Magic, but according to reports, the two didn't mention 'Melo's upcoming appearance.

A spokesperson for "SNL" said, " We never confirm guest stars."

Elton John will be the host and musical guest for this Saturday's show, but it's any body's guess if 'Melo will show up with his own supporting cast for the segment.

Melo's teammate Amar'e Stoudemire could make an appearance at the studio.  It seems like he hasn't really been seen at Madison Square Garden in a while.

LaLa Vasquez, 'Melo's wife and reality show fixture, is a pretty good bet to be there.  The "entertainer" is always looking for the spotlight.

Anthony is no stranger to the camera.  He was in Common's video "Be" and shot the movie "Amazing" this past year with Orlando Magic star Dwight Howard.

"Amazing" was shot in Bejing, Shanghai and New York and is directed by an award-winning Chinese director.  The NBA players star alongside many of China's leading actors in a basketball-themed film about young people  achieving their dreams through hard work.

NBA players who tread from the court to the stage are a rare breed.  Some score--Ray Allen in "He Got Game"-- while others foul out--Shaquille O'Neal in "Kazaam."  Rick Fox is unforgettable in anything.

Melo's star power at the Garden had dimmed in recent weeks during the Knicks losing streak.  Maybe a Derek Jeter style appearance in drag is just the wake-up call he needs.  Although Jeter did have a championship ring to accessorize his skirt and high heels.

Here's hoping 'Melo finds his inner funny-bone and skips the all-night wrap-party.  He's got  a game against the Cavs on Sunday.  Now they're funny.